December 19, 2008

The Year in Cell Phone Pics

My friends and I recently decided to start a cell phone photography business; little did I know that I'd been building my portfolio all year long! It all started when I got my Razr phone, thanks to my mother-in-law. I immediately began snapping photos and sending them to my contacts. People immediately took notice. I got such a good response to the blurriness and crappy quality of light in my photos that my good friends approached me about forming a business.

Thus, JealousE Douchebag Photography was born.

Here are some of the best cell phone pics I've taken this year, all of which will be featured prominently on the JD Photography website!

This one will be in the "what not to wear" gallery.
This one will feature prominently in the "best hairstyles of 2008" gallery.
This one is just pure mastery. A jaundiced-looking Melinda with a giant straw, absolutely perfect lighting, not at all posed...
Kim's license plate
a cupcake that looks like a steaming pile of poo, but that tasted much better
the cutest husband ever holding a very cute baby
Mandy getting all dolled up for her wedding
a mushroom I drew (Super Mario Bros. style!)
me wearing Mandy's sweatshirt and crinoline - totally artistically blurry and photojournalistical
the cutest husband ever, in need of a major teeth cleaning
ahhh, the joys of Lasik (I obviously didn't take this, but I have no problem taking credit for it since I'm an immoral mofo)
yay! sculpture in Minneapolis!
someone named Sylvia who is very happy but also very evil
biggest lemon ever (notice the coin for scale)
best license plate ever
Mao attacks!
dark thoughts while sitting in the most boring presentation ever
Mao, with eye crust (the day we brought her home)
big fat smiley face guy

The award for the best cell phone pic taken by someone other than me (because clearly I am the master) goes to Melinda, who drew a picture of herself flinging poo.

I'm sure the cell phone photography business will be very lucrative, but we have made a vow never to compromise our artistry just to make a buck.


thebookmill said...

I love these photos! Especially the ones of doodles. They are hilarious. Your cell phone takes amazingly good quality pictures.

amber said...

too funny!

Bex said...

I love it, keep up the good work :)

Angie Eats Peace said...

I have to send in my submissions.

Nanette said...

Freakin' hilarious! I especially like the spoon!

WeezerMonkey said...

I love Sylvia's! If you haven't already, I hope you get to eat at her restaurant in Harlem someday!

phairhead said...

i iove the candids! esp. Mao attacking yr booty

vwhippie said...

hahah these are great.. I love the random pictures i get on my phone!!! <3

ladydot42 said...

Beautiful. Thank you very much for posting my poo flinging picture. One of my best works of art if I do say so myself. I will be posting others of my work on my blog soon.

dapotato said...

too much good stuff. i want kim's license plate now.

alejna said...

I predict grand things for JD Photography! How can you go wrong with a showpiece like a cupcake that looks like poo?